trust issues.

i've never really had committment issues. i consider myself a boyfriend kind of girl who seems like i can't settle not because i don't like the idea of it, but because if i'm going to only be with one person, they better be damn well worth not seeing other people. this eliminates the possibility of a wandering eye and wandering lips.

i'm not exactly on a quest right now for a boyfriend...i'm actually still really jaded from the boyfriend turned ex turned boyfriend turned ex experience. the emotional drainage is still there and probably will still be there until i can fully replace him in my heart with someone else. unfortunately, i can't seem to take dating very seriously right now. what most girls would love to hear doesn't really appeal to me at the moment.

most girls love hearing themselves referred to as "my girl" as in "i only came over here to see my girl" (which was said last night). most girls also like to hear a guy pour there heart out, admit their flaws and call later to make sure they haven't scared you away with their honesty. girls also like to hear that they are trusted, ecspecially by people with trust issues. so....you'd think that i'd be smitten by the fact that someone sees me as their pseudo-girlfriend (i guess). yeah....you'd think that. but, unfortunately, after hearing all this good stuff, i layed on the dirty patio with my roommate and felt like the biggest ass hole on the entire planet. he, who i've doubted for the last month, declared his exclusivity to me. me, who is anticipating date number 2 with the accountant (who called from his business trip...swoooooon), is meeting corpus guy in austin on saturday, and has a sushi date with "met at sherlocks #87837192" on sunday. yeah, i shouldn't be trusted by the untrusting. at least i'm willing to admit it, right?