three years to freedom.

the ex and me on my 22nd birthday (does it look like i'm strangling him?)

almost 2 years later... H and me (and a few of his coworkers) at his work party a week ago.

strange how much can change in through the years, ecspecially when you can vividly recall what your life was like at each point.

three years ago i was juggling guys, semi-dating a guy who was too nice for his own good and had yet to meet the ex. i was about to turn 21 and was a little (very) wild and very happy and carefree. had yet to have my heart broken severely.

two years ago i was with the ex (see picture above), thought i'd met the man i'd one day marry, but was putting up with a lot of shit i didn't need to be putting up with. i was happy yet terribly unhappy all at the same time. that picture makes me look pretty darn happy though...guess i didn't know how things would crash in 2 months.

one year ago i was freshly back with the ex. he was amazing, adoring and most of all- fun! i was hopefull (and blind) and looking forward to a weekend with the ex. and a few months of bliss...that would predictably not last.

now, i am realistic. happy. optimistic. but, the ex won't leave me alone! he can't crack me now and maybe he is just trying to be nice, but calling me two days in a row just to hear about my thanksgiving, inviting me out with his friends and texting me "i miss you carrie" just doesn't seem right for a guy with a girlfriend. i'm his ex too! i'm the girl he thought he'd marry too! how is this fair to his girlfriend? H knows the situation (well, most of it) with the ex and would rather me not see him. wasn't planning on it, but i don't mind him not wanting me to. as he said "i trust you. just not him. he's clearly not over you."

i think the ex is over me...he just doesn't want me to be over him. and i am. completely. thank you H!